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悲しい。。。悲しすぎる。。。かも

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Apr. 16th, 2005 | 04:13 am
気持ち: rejected rejected
音楽: 囁き ~Buck tick (a total kick ass J-rock band)~

悲しい。寂しい。愛していたい。。。愛されていたい!
Well, that is how I feel currently. for those who look at this and thing, WTF?? Dude I can't read that!!, Let me translate with a little more description...

6 years ago, I was involved in a rather distressing relationship. I did not like it, but for fear that I would be alone, I stuck it out as long as I could. I later realized that the person I was with at the time was somewhat a control freak and did not really value me, or my feelings, and I decided that i would leave her. Since then, I have been having the most difficult time trying to find someone new. Out of lack of relationship, I have been daddling my way through my grad program. Yet, I feel more and more incomplete as time passes. So, the other night, and even today, I realized how depressed I really am, and how much I really wish I had someone who would take time to care for me and for my feelings. But as I look around I find.... no one. Every place I go I see couples and then I think of my current situation. there is a saying, "The grass is always greener on the other side." No doubt, but trading a relationship for loneliness? ARGH. Granted, that relationship was one not worth being in and I do not regret getting out of it, but It would be nice if I could meet someone. I sound desperate, don't I? But here is the funny thing, I am super skeptical and too afraid to rush into anything as well!! Hahaa, weird I know, but with that you can somewhat understand my depression.

Anyway, I came across something that sparked my interested, someone had mentioned that they had a "Japanese Journal" and I thought, "how kewl!!" so I might create a journal, just to type in Japanese!! If I do, those who read japanese I will inform. Take care

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Comments {4}

From: twizzlertwit
Date: Apr. 16th, 2005 09:43 pm (UTC)
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Ya know, sometimes I wonder which is worse. Not having a relationship or having a bad one lol. I think both are probably pretty bad in different ways. But at least if you're not in a bad one you're available to find a good one. Either way though it's all trouble.

I hope you find somebody great and that's not a control freak! And if you ever wanna talk to somebody feel free to im' me sometime. It's drspoto on aim.

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yamkaori

From: yamkaori
Date: Apr. 17th, 2005 11:51 am (UTC)
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i think you are still cute young and have a younger soul.that's great!
i am younger than you,but i lost girlsh heart,everyday just counting my moneys...like 番町皿屋敷のお菊!!!!that sucks indeed!!don't loose your sensitive heart,if you do,you can find the best girl for you.i like you so much because of your tenderness,cuteness.... i believe there must be great girl who loves you :) you are so valuable man!!!

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laurysa

From: laurysa
Date: Apr. 21st, 2005 01:29 am (UTC)
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I don't know if you'll get this in time, but I just wnated to check and see if you're still planning on going to the livejournal meetup this evening.

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From: 1warrior
Date: May. 3rd, 2005 11:10 pm (UTC)
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Japanese... cool.

Some relationships go bad, but don't let that of future relationships go sour.

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